Showing posts from September, 2011

Thursday, September 15, 2011

I got up and made sure my son was up and out of the house for school.  I got showered and dressed ready to go to the coupon thing.  I got there early and I called my daughter's therapist to make sure she had come home (since she had AWOLed) and she did.  We talked about how my daughter doesn't even seem to be trying and whether she actually has any empathy.  Then I went into the class and I learned a lot about how to work our neighboring stores, the coupons and ads.  I will have to see how it works.  But so far the computer program they have seems to really help a lot by figuring out the best buys and which stores and which coupons to use.

I left that and headed home.  Talked to a couple friends and played around with the website and program to see what kind of deals I could get - seems like I could cut our grocery bill in half if I really applied myself. 

My son came home from school and did homework.  He wasn't able to get a hold of friends in time so I took him to his c…

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Arrgghhh - I really need to go to bed earlier - I am sooo tired.  I got up barely enough to stumble to my son's room and make sure he was up.  I went back to bed - my hubby got up on time and I was so dead tired but I forced myself out of bed.  He headed for work.  I stripped the bed and started the laundry.  I was so unfocused today bouncing from one thing to another.  I just don't know what was wrong with me - I felt like I had no direction.  I was able to do several loads of laundry and check several of the websites for jobs, I was able to find an upgrade phone for my son that has what he needs - and then he only had to choose which one (both are free upgrades).  I got my severance check.  Taxes suck - not as much as I hoped left - but at least it should help keep me afloat for awhile - of course the sooner I get a job the more that it can be used for the surgery and not living on.

Tomorrow I will go to an extreme couponing class to learn how to save lots of money - maybe t…

Tuesday, September 13, 2011 - My hubby's 51st Bday

So exhausted, I got up at 7am and baked a cake.  I got my son up since he had a doctor's appointment to get his prescriptions under the new health plan.  We went to the doctor's appointment and the doctor was great and did all of his prescriptions with no problem.  I took him to school with him being silly all the way and trying to get me to take him home.  I then got home and asked my hubby what he wanted to eat as it was around 11am.  He decided Taco Bell so I went and got it. We were both so hungry it tasted so good.  It was so nice to relax with him and now that he has decided on the surgery he is in an amazing mood for it being his birthday which he hates.  He then took the parrot into the bedroom to play computer games (the parrot loves to watch the computer while he is playing games) and I decorated his birthday cake.  Which of course was a CakeWrecks style cake.

He really was amused.  My son got home and I checked his homework (hubby was sleeping) and then it was time …

Monday, September 12, 2011 - the appointment

Today started off good even though hubby and I were tired from going to bed and not sleeping well.  We were both really anxious.  I made sure my son was getting up and we headed to the airport.  We got there and parked with no problem.  In security despite my hubby being anxious - *I* was the one who they decided to do a pat down on - hubby walked right through.  To think someone was worried that my skirt could hide some scary weapon - LOL.  So we get through security buy a pathetic breakfast from Burger King and wait.  I called my son to make sure he was on the way out to school.  We boarded the plane and took off on time.  Then just as they said we could take out electronic devices - we made a turn and they asked us to return them (about 20 min into the flight) - we landed back at our original airport.  They had us sit there for over 4 hours!  Our appointment was for noon - and at 12:30 we were still at our original airport sitting on the hot airplane not going anywhere.  Finally we…

Sunday, September 11, 2011 - For us - 7 years ...

I got up with a mission.  I blocked everything out of my head - I ignored what was in the news and just went to a couple different stores.  At one Michael's I got a great sales person who called several stores until she found the store that had them.  I went there and then stopped by a Target to pick up my hubby some stuff for his contacts.  As I drove home my daughter called me.  She was struggling so much - it is a good thing and a hard thing.  she was crying, processing her emotions.  I know how much it hurts - but I am so glad she is able to finally start feeling again rather than stuffing her emotions and fear and it coming out so aggressive and pushing us away to protect herself.  I even handed my hubby the phone and he said it was real and what a difference from the last several 9/11 that she has gone through.

I know this one is going to be hard for her - but maybe finally she will start being able to heal.

I wrote this last year and updated it for this year because a lot o…

Saturday, September 10, 2011

I got up and started trying to work on my resume and follow the homework that one company gave me.  I just couldn't do it.  I was frustrated and tired and just done - I wanted to crawl into a hole and not come out.  So I went back to bed and cuddled with my hubby.  He teased and tickled me and eventually we got up to have something to eat.  We then watched several shows that made us laugh.  And caught up with the Mentalist.  It was getting late into the afternoon - evening so hubby took a shower and we went to look at an upper scale plus size shop to see if we could get me any interview clothes.  Oh I did for get to mention yesterday - one huge surprise - well you know when you find an extra 5 or so in your pocket that you forgot you had - well like 3 years ago I got some weird thing from a lawyer saying I had unclaimed funds.  I didn't believe it at first but he had some info that made it seem like he was not a fraud so I filled out some papers and then forgot - during my bre…

Friday, September 9, 2011

I got up today - my son was not getting going on time - I finally just had to drive him to school because he was running so late.  I cuddled with my hubby and then he got up and although still hurting was able to go to work.  The company that was hired by my old company as part of the severance package had a orientation meeting on the web.  I did it and then continued working through my list of group homes.  I then got a call from my personal agent with that company and we talked and he gave me homework to do over the weekend and on Monday while I am traveling. 

Amazing how fast the day went by.  My son got home from school - we got all of his stuff together and I then took him to go meet to leave for the camping trip with the Venture Crew.  After I dropped him off (we were late because of horrible traffic) I called my hubby and said since I was close to our favorite pizza place I could pick up the pizza. I did and then got home - he got home shortly after that. 

We watched a few epis…

Thursday, September 8, 2011

I got up and made sure my son was up - he got up and went to school.  I cuddled with my hubby and then he tried to get up and his back was out.  He called into work.  I worked on my computer for a bit - The guy from HR sent a letter that should work for us getting medical insurance and then I started checking the different job boards and starting to go through a page of group homes from adjoining counties.  I then left to return my son's cell phone and get my nails done. 

While I was getting my nails done I did get a call from a recruiter over an IT job.  It lifted my spirits.  I did an over the phone interview and he sounded so positive and said he wanted me to sign some papers and have them to him in less than 30 min.  I called my hubby who was wonderful - despite his drugged sleep he was able to figure out how to use my Mac (he has a PC) and get the guy's email - open the document sign my name to it - save it - and then reply to him and attach it.  I was in a pretty good mo…

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

I got up and made sure my son got up for school and headed off for school.  I went back and cuddled with my hubby and then he headed off for work.  I decided to do something for me so I called about a laser hair removal appointment that I had purchased on Groupon and so that is scheduled for Oct 6th for 1:30pm.

Then I worked on several applications and left a message for my daughter's therapist to find out if I had to pick my daughter up or not.  Our friend called and she was soo tired she was nearly falling asleep at the wheel so we chatted to keep her alert and she also calmed me down from the fear of having to do therapy with my daughter.  After I got off the phone with her - I took a shower and then the therapist called as I was heading out to the door.  She reminded me that my daughter only was like that on Sunday's phone call because she is trying to push me away.  She said she would have someone else pick up my daughter so I didn't have to since I was struggling.  I…

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

So Tuesday I got up - made sure my son was up and going to school.  Went back to bed and cuddled with my hubby until he was ready to get up.  When he got up I got started on finishing my resume and as soon as he left I cleaned the bathroom, stripped the bed, started dinner and worked on 2 applications.  I went grocery shopping, started dinner, found the list of group homes I could check out, checked craigs list for job, took out garbage, cleaned the refrigerator and worked on another application.

I got the mail and filled out all of my unemployment stuff that was in the mail.  My son came home with lots of things for me to sign and he had homework.  We got that done and then I took him to choir - but on our way I stopped at the grocery store to get my son some non-dairy ice-cream.  After I dropped him off I got school supplies. 

I found out his upgraded cell phone did not have the stuff he wanted so I set it up for a return.  My hubby talked to our friend and I then went to go pick my…

Monday, September 5, 2011

Late Sunday night, my hubby was talking to our best friend.  Her cat started throwing up really bad.  It didn't look good so just past midnight our time - 3am her time she took her cat to a 24 hour vet hospital.  They gave him an IV and she went home to get a few hour sleep.

I woke up in the AM and checked in with my friend - not good a mass in his intestines - a complete blockage  surgery scheduled for sometime on Tuesday.  She just lost her fiance a few months ago - she really does not need to lose a cat she has had for 11-12 years.  I kept her in my thoughts and prayers all day and her cat too.

My son finally got up and started doing a little house work but then said he needed to do something for scouts.  Wow - I wonder if I will ever see him sometimes.  I am trying to get myself in good mood - planning my graduation and dinner afterwards and focusing on this week's job search.  Trying not to think about my daughter's therapy session that I am dreading. 

Thoughts are ju…

Sunday, September 4, 2011

I got up and showered and dressed.  I got my son up (2x) and then we headed out.  We stopped at a pet store to pick up our Parrot a few treats.  Then we went to the shoe store so my son could get new shoes for school.  On our way out of the mall we stopped for a Jamba Juice.  Hmm small moments that are just so nice.  I really appreciated it and the enjoyable conversation and time I could have with my son.

We got home and my son watched some tv and I did some job searching.  We decided to go out to eat for lunch.  It was a good lunch and we enjoyed it.  But somehow the heat and the bright sun gave me a migraine as we walked out to the car from the restaurant.  We got home, I took some meds and took a nap.  I felt a bit better but still was struggling with a pretty bad headache.

Then I started thinking about a meal after my graduation.
After looking at several things - I found the RainForest Cafe kind of got excited - about 25 min away - called my mom (why oh why do I do that) who poo …

Saturday, September 3, 2011

I got up later than I wanted so I was in a bit of pain but not horrible.  I have been struggling with so many feelings since I lost my job - almost feels as if it has been a long time - even though it has only been a couple of days.  It has brought up so many issues that I thought had been gone or that I had conquered.  One of my issues is that I earn less than my hubby.  I had gotten ok with that - I had made more before than any of my spouses and always tended to be the breadwinner and therefore not dependent on them for anything.  This relationship with my hubby was different.  He made more than me - and progressively as time went on and he got pay increases and I did not - he made A LOT more than me.  OK I got used to that and learned to deal with being somewhat reliant on his income to cover things.  Now THIS happens and I have NO INCOME.  I actually have to completely rely on his income until I find a new job.

I should be ok with it but I am not.  It is driving me crazy, I feel …

Friday, September 2, 2011

Today I worked on some applications and scanned and emailed one that I had to manually sign.
 I have a list of things to do but I struggled for a little bit before I was able to get going again.  My moods vary so much.  I am so scared, but I know things will work out.

I read this today...

Changing requires much more than thought…it will require a spiritual and heartfelt component-It is all of you that is seeking peace.
~Juli Alvarado

It helped me a bit.  My son is spending the night at a friend's house again.  so I know I will be by myself all day... so back to work.

I called Kaiser to find out how to request medical records for our new doctors.   I contacted my daughter's previous therapists to let them know I am looking for a job in the field and I do have my BBS MFTi number now so I can really work.  I contacted a social worker that worked with my daughter and let her know I was looking for a job.  I think my first direction should be group homes.  I did some online search…

Thursday, September 1, 2011 - Starting over - AGAIN

Ok - things on this blog are going to be a bit wilder and written probably a bit weirder as I process and deal with everything I am doing.

So first thing - I SLEPT IN!!!  I might as well enjoy this while it lasts!  But I still had a ton to do and did get done today.  And so many emotional swings.

First thing that was the most important is start getting medical insurance and medications taken care of - that is the most urgent.

First I contacted my daughter's social worker to switch my daughter to have Medi Cal as her primary.  So I sent her the forms she needed - now she is taken care of.

Next I scanned marriage and birth certificates and tax returns and sent them to my hubby at work.  He had already filled out the online paper work but just needed the backup documentation.  OK all should be good on that so then I started calling and finding doctors and setting up doctor appointments so our meds don't lapse.  I ran into a brick wall for a bit trying to get an appointment within…