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Showing posts from September, 2015

Personal Therapy

Today I had personal therapy.  I am still working on my issues I have with my daughter.  I think I am slowly being able to let go even though I cannot cut ties or even feel safe, but trying to find calm in the current way of being.  I just wish I knew she was really safe and making good choices.  She is so smart and capable if she wants to move forward I believe she could.

A little excitement - weight

While I have not gone off of my low carb eating plan - I was eating more recently than I should (not of carbs but of cheese and nuts and carrots) because I was really hungry (struggling with depression and emotions) so as usual I avoided getting on the scale (after all you don't have to admit you have a problem if you don't see it right?) Well I got on the scale today and - I lost a little weight - not as much as I should have but I am still making progress.  This has renewed my dedication to healthy eating and walking more. Progress - even slow - is a good thing.

Healing myself

So I am working on healing ALL of me. I have a health coach and am working to become healthier - I am walking more and eating very few carbs, losing weight and hopefully the blood work continues to get better. I am working with a life coach to help me heal some of my basic issues and to help me get my career and my dreams off the ground. I am working with a therapist to move forward and emotionally heal from the PTSD of raising a child who experienced trauma. Today was a life coaching session (and allergy shots).  I have been getting better about feeling that I am a wonderful person who deserves to be married to the awesome hubby I have.  I noticed how words really do affect us.  I was able to say "I am A Goddess" but when it came to "I am Goddess" it was really hard.  I understand the concept - I am Goddess in her earth form - just as all women are and all men are God.  We need to see that we are the divine - that is not to say that we treat others as lesser -

Hunter's or Harvest Full Moon also the Blood Red Super Moon

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The Hunter's or Harvest Full Moon is the first full moon after Mabon (Autumn Equinox).  The Hunter's Full Moon is named because the full moon give light to hunters tracking their prey before the cold winter settles in.  They are able to stock up on the protein they will need to make it through the winter. It is also known as the Harvest Full Moon because we are harvesting all that we worked for this year. I am harvesting my intentions which feels awesome: I have been walking more - I have my fitbit and while the past week I was taking care of myself emotionally and not doing all of the walking - to day is a new day and I will walk at least 10,000 steps today! From a wonderful Alaska vacation, to therapy and coaching and buying myself clothes that I love - I am practicing more self care. I passed my exams and have my license now for 5 months! I am seeking therapy to keep myself from enabling my daughter and learning how to cope with things in a healthy manner

Fall Equinox/Autum Begins/Mabon

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  The last several years I have been away from home on Mabon.  This year I got to be home (mainly because it was the middle of the week).  I am feeling pretty good about my life at this point in time.  I am working on myself emotionally and professionally.  My husband and I are still in love and I am looking forward to the weather cooling.   Let peace go where we let things go and let everything we let go, leave us with the knowledge and experiences we need for the future.

Letting go of expecting the worst and my closet

Yesterday I cleaned out my closet.  I had 2 bags of clothes that are now too big for me.  Normally I would them box them up and put them away in case I gained weight again.  So instead of expecting the worst that I would gain the weight back - I am looking ahead positively and letting go of what doesn't fit and moving forward.  Everything will be donated to Goodwill.  I then went online and replaced some of the clothes that no longer fit.  Filling up my closet with hope and things that match my authentic self.  Now I just need to apply this to other areas of my life.