Saturday, April 4, 2015

Full Seed Moon

The Seed Full Moon is a time for planting first crops, especially corn.  It is when you start to make things happen and the energy to start to create.  Seeds will be planted and creation will happen.  The seeds will start to sprout from this energy.  This is a good time in your personal life to really dig your heels in and start those projects you intended to start this year.  Today especially the energy is very powerful towards creativity and initiating the beginning of what you start.  We will also experience a total lunar eclipse which is exciting and often shows the beginning, ending or major change in relationships.

I am getting close to taking my final exam for my Marriage and Family Therapist License.  I am now looking into a new group of clients that are gender non-conforming youth and I am riding this energy to get everything really going.  I am excited about the direction everything is going.

Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Spring cleaning

Today I got a couple of things for the kitchen - a second cabinet for under the bar so I can clean off part of the counter and baskets to move bread and fruits off of the counter.

I am trying to clean and organize my life so I am feeling much more relaxed.  I have more areas to conquer but feeling better about things - amazing how good I feel when things are organized.

Saturday, March 28, 2015

Waiting is sooo hard to do

I hate waiting.  I turned in my application for the next exam on March 11.  On March 24th my check for my application was cashed.  I am desperate to schedule my final exam.  I just want to be over with the wait.  I hate not knowing how hard I should study and when - because if I study like crazy now but end up with over a month to wait then what I am I going to do?  I am trying hard to be patient but I am so close to the end it just frustrates me.

Oh well I guess I need to learn more patience.

Friday, March 20, 2015

Ostara - First Day of Spring

Today, March 20th, is the first day of SPRING!!!!
This is what is happening to my seeds of intent:
1.  To walk more - this has been on hold because I have severe pain in my foot.

2.  To make sure I do self-care - I have been going out with friends and making sure I have fun and read enjoyable books more.

3.  To pass my licensing exams - I passed my 1st exam and am waiting for approval to schedule my final exam.

4.  To find a way to be supportive of my daughter and not enable her - I have been saying no to her and not trying to contact her.  I am letting go emotionally.

5.  To continue to follow the path the Goddess has put in front of me especially when it comes to being a therapist.  - I get to stay in the office where I am and get guidance from my awesome supervisor.

So many new things on the horizon - I am excited for the future - oh and I will be taking a cruise to Alaska with my hubby and parents in the summer.

Monday, March 16, 2015

One exam down... One exam to go

On March 11, 2015 I passed my California Marriage and Family Therapist Standard Written Exam!  I am studying again for the next exam.  It is nearly unreal.  I am almost there.  I keep waiting for the other shoe to fall.  I struggle with self sabotage.  I am working so hard not to allow myself to slip into my self-sabotage mode.  (I struggle to force myself to study).  But I am going to do it.  A nearly 8 year journey is nearly over and a new one is about to begin.

Thursday, March 5, 2015

Full Storm Moon

Today is the Full Storm Moon.  Storms are often brewing in the weather and in our lives.  This moon is at the end of February or in March and before the Vernal Equinox.  The weather is violently vacillating between winter and spring.  Often we are dealing with the same in our own emotional realm.  We are struggling between still being in our dark realm of self-reflection and starting to come out and be part of a community.  We struggle to make room for others in our plans or seeing how our plans affect others.

This year I tried to help my daughter she begged me to send her to Denver, CO to a friend so she could start over.  She didn't even last 2 days when she left there and hooked up with some guy.  Then just a few days after that she was homeless again.  

It is frustrating when you watch others make bad choices, and not trying to rescue or enable them.  I need to continue to work internally on myself and externally on my new role is a parent of adult children.

Friday, February 27, 2015

My Heart is Broken... continued....

So my daughter left her roommate's place with her roommates clothes and didn't come back.  Then in the AM on her FB I see she is now in a "relationship" with a guy who is flashing the "Blood" gang sign and she only friended him that day.  She is no longer speaking to me.  I tried my best.  despite all of the nasty mean things she has said to me when she asked for my help I came through spending just under $1000 in less than a week to get her to Colorado.  Yet less than 2 days later she is trashing her roommate and other friends.

I just don't know how to let go.....